Shattered Moon Part 7: Poisoned Fang
by Spunky0ne
Summary: When Byakuya is somehow poisoned, a deadly race against time begins. Will Renji and Byakuya unravel the mystery and find the cure or will this be the end of their love story? Bya/Ren Series #7
1. Love in the Rukon District

**(**This is a Bya/Ren story that does not really require you to have read my others, though I may reference them as storyline dictates. So if you haven't already read, Pieces of a Shattered Moon, Blood Red Fang, Pride With a Vengeance, and The Price of Defiance, don't feel that you have to read them first. They are a good read, though! Enjoy…and please review.)**

**Chapter 1: Love in the Rukon District**

_At twelve years old, I pretty much decided that my heart would belong to Rukia. She was, after all, my constant companion. We spent all of our time together. We got up every morning and went out into the streets before the younger ones woke, and stole or otherwise acquired food for everyone. We knew inside that stealing was wrong, but it was that or whore ourselves for food…and we weren't going to allow ourselves to stoop to that. It wasn't an easy life, but it was better than dying on the streets of Inuzuri._

_When I wasn't focusing on survival, I liked to rest beneath the trees or in them and watch Rukia play with water flowers in the river, or to look over into the distance, where I could see the dark outline of Sokyoku Hill in the faraway Sereitei. I let my mind go at times like that. It was one of the few times when I could relax and not think about anything. Often, I would fall asleep in the trees and sometimes Rukia would just give me a gentle pat and let me sleep there. Only when the weather was good, though. It was on one of those nights that something unexpected happened._

_I had fallen asleep some time before. I was extremely tired from practicing kido spells. Rukia and I were determined that we would get out of the Rukon District someday and become soul reapers. Actually, I wanted to all along. It wasn't until later, when the hard life of Inuzuri had claimed most of those we grew up with that Rukia finally truly decided that it was time to leave._

_Anyway, it was one of those nights when Rukia had left me sleeping in the tree and had gone back to the abandoned shack we all shared. Everything was silent except for a soft breeze moving the tree branches. I came awake late at night to the small crunching sound of feet under the tree. Thinking it was probably Rukia, I prepared to drop down and surprise her. The one who ended up being surprised was me. Because when my feet landed on the ground and I took a closer look, I realized rather quickly that I wasn't looking at Rukia. Her face was too delicate, too much like porcelain, her hair too light and her body to fine and slender. She was one of the not-so-lucky, who had been forced down that path Rukia and I had enabled each other to avoid. And tonight she had paid the price. Her hair was tumbled and on looking closer, I could see bruises rising on her skin. Her lip was bleeding and she was breathing heavily. She was ready to run away, but she had been hurt too badly. Her legs gave out beneath her and she dropped down at my feet._

_I dropped to my knees next to her and I used the meager healing kido I possessed. For some reason it actually worked and in a short time, the bruises were disappearing and the color was returning to her skin. I didn't have anything warm to drape over her, so I did as we Rukon kids had to. I used my body heat to warm her._

_She was soft and pale, and I wondered how any creature so soft and fine could survive here. I wondered how she could bear the hard life of a prostitute at such a young age. There had to be more to her story. No one becomes a prostitute in Inuzuri without there being compelling reasons behind it. In Inuzuri, prostitution is a last resort…for those who can't make a living any other way._

_We rested there beneath the tree until she began to stir just before dawn. Her eyes opened and she looked up at me with calm gratitude in her eyes._

"_Thank you for healing me," she whispered, then she kissed me…and kept kissing me, until my hands came up and gently pushed her away._

_She looked surprised._

"_I have nothing else to offer in return," she explained, "I was just trying to offer you something for your trouble."_

_I swallowed hard, realizing that this is how things work in Inuzuri. _

"_You don't need to do that," I told her, "touching her hair gently, "just tell me something. Why do you do this? Is there some reason? I'm part of a family of kids. If you want, you could come and live with us. You don't have to go back."_

_Her eyes filled with tears and her kiss felt like butterfly wings on my cheek._

"_You are very sweet to offer me this…and without even knowing my name or my story. I would go with you, but…I am protecting someone. I can't say any more. Just that."_

"_Do you have a name?" I asked._

"_Kasumi," she told me._

"_I'm Renji Abarai."_

"_Thank you for your help, Renji Abarai. Now, I'm afraid that I must go. I will be missed."_

"_Wait a moment," I said, touching her arm, "Kasumi…if you ever need my help again, you can find me here. I come here every night to watch the sunset."_

"_And sometimes you sleep in the trees. Thank you again, Renji. I will remember that."_

_She disappeared into the morning mist. She came back a few nights later, not in need of healing, but company. She seemed to want to share my company and I was more than happy to offer it. I never sought to pressure her, but with time, things grew passionate between us. She would come late at night and stay until just before dawn, then disappear into the mist. We never talked about what she did to survive. It didn't matter. We were all just surviving in whatever ways we could. She had a reason for walking the path she was on. When I asked, she always gave the same vague answer she gave me that first night._

_Young hearts burn with passion and idealism and I thought I could help her get away from that life, so I offered to do that, yet again. Again, she refused, but I could tell that she was wearing thin. It was too hard a life for her and she was beginning to show the signs of that. Then, she became pregnant. It didn't matter to me whether it was mine or someone else's. I thought that this would finally bring here home with me to stay._

"_There is a doctor I know who will make sure the baby is healthy and I will be here to take care of you…I promise."_

_She smiled and although I thought she would refuse me as she had every time before, this time she accepted…and she did not go back to wherever they kept her. Time passed and the baby grew inside her. I made sure she ate well, and all of the other kids helped to watch over her. We eagerly awaited the arrival of our little brother or sister._

_Then, one night, they came for her. It goes without saying that once you walk that dark path in Inuzuri, it remembers you. They found us sleeping in the tree together and tore her from my arms. They beat me into unconsciousness…but something went very wrong. Because when I woke, she was still there, her beautiful porcelain skin kissed with morning dew. But she never moved. They didn't want her back. They only came to us to kill her._

"_Kasumi!"_

"Renji, are you all right?" Byakuya's voice sounds strange after having seemed to go back in time.

"_Yeah," I tell him in a voice just above a whisper, "it was just a dream."_

"_Do you wish to talk about it?" he asks, rolling over and resting his head on my shoulder, his body warm and relaxed against mine._

_He doesn't know that much about my life in the Rukon District. He knows I didn't have it easy, but he leaves it to me to share what I want him to know. I had almost let go of it…although it took a long time. We all have our scars. Byakuya and I both. But tellisg him won't change the facts. Kasumi died a long time ago. I push the memory to the back of my mind and pull Byakuya closer. Whatever happened before, he and I are together right now._

"_Nah…I just need something to help me sleep. You know anything that might help?"_

_Dark eyes meet mine with mayhem in their depths._

"_I have a few ideas."_

"_You do?" I ask, smiling._

"_We could engage in sparring…that usually tires you."_

_I have to laugh at that._

"_How about something that doesn't hurt?" I ask, blinking at the sight of passion rising in his eyes._

"_Well…it might hurt a little…"_

"_Yes?" I say._

"_Shunpo race?" he queries._

"_Nah…you're too good at it. I wouldn't stand a chance."_

"_Well then," he says, bringing his lips close to my ear, "might I suggest…"_

_I don't know what heats me more…his breath on my ear or what he suggests._

"_I think I'll choose option three," I whisper back._

"_I see," he says, studying me in the dark, "but make no mistake, Renji, I can't promise you that someone won't get hurt."_

"_I'll survive," I assure him._

"_Well, then, if you're sure," he breathes._

_His body wraps around mine and our hips come together with a jolt. He buries his face in my throat, his lips and tongue paving the way for a surprisingly aggressive set of nips and bites. His fingers are in my hair, sliding through its length. I'm lucky there are no tangles. That would hurt…but he did warn me. His hips thrust into mine, making me moan and push my hips upward for deeper contact. _

_I miss the moment he releases the ties on our kimonos. I just know that all of a sudden, I feel the heat and pressure of his skin against mine, and it almost sends me into oblivion. I see the look he's giving me and start to open my legs, but he grabs my wrists and brings them down to rest on either side of my head then laces his fingers into mine. He gives me a very passionate, indulgent kiss, before raising his upper body away from mine. As he moves, he sinks down onto me. He stops for a moment, breathing heavily and then he starts to move again. His eyes halfway opened and locked on mine, he begins slowly, then moves increasingly faster and harder, his breath shortening and his eyes glazing over with intense pleasure. I can't hold my hips still and they thrust hungrily upward, deeper into his._

_I love watching him when we make love, because there is so much emotion in his face. He always begins looking calm and in control, but when he rides me like this, he lets himself go. It starts in his dark eyes with a exotic, wild glint, then they widen with intensity and the emotion spreads like wildfire across the rest of his face, making his nostrils flare, his lips tremble softly and his head tilt forward so his hair falls all around his face. I know he's going to climax when his eyes begin to drift almost closed and his legs tighten around me. The sight of this alone makes me climax as well and then his body sinks down onto mine and he finishes things by treating my mouth to a few minutes of very intense exploration with his._

_Knowing I'm not likely to go to sleep just yet, we move to the huge jetted tub and he attacks my mouth again, his hands sliding down my hot wet torso, pulling me closer, waiting until we've both recovered enough to continue. By the time we drain the tub and return to bed, we're both exhausted and happy, and I've forgotten the nightmare that brought me awake._

"_Will you be able to sleep now, Renji?" he asks, his breath teasing the skin on my chest._

"_Yes, thanks, Byakuya."_

_He gives me a final kiss and drifts off to sleep in my arms. I'm slower to fall asleep, but the soft drip of water in the now empty tub, the warm weight of him against me, and the soft night sounds creeping in from outside lull me to sleep more gradually._


	2. Drowse

**Chapter 2: Drowse **

If last night's bedroom 'sparring' was fun, Byakuya and I are really in our element now as we face each other at the top of Sokyoku Hill. Around us stands a throng of young soul reapers, many from the soul reaper academy, and some from the new recruits from all of the squads. It's a big deal for these kids to see high-level soul reapers spar…but to see hard hitters like Byakuya and me go all out? That's the deal of a lifetime for many of them.

Byakuya has placed a negative reiatsu cage around the top of the hill, while leaving protective space for a viewing gallery. Most of these kids have never seen a negative reiatsu cage at all, let alone one sporting a viewing gallery. I have to say that I'm pretty impressed…and I know what Byakuya's abilities are…

Major events like these are carefully monitored for safety, both for the combatants and for the viewers. The stealth force monitors reiatsu levels all around to make sure there are no weaknesses in the reiatsu cage. They don't figure it will be a problem with Byakuya having raised the cage, but they do a thorough job of it anyway. In addition, only combatants may carry weapons. Great care is taken to ensure there are no accidents.

Byakuya and I have chosen to spar full strength and without power reduction, meaning that if we really wanted to kill each other, we certainly could. Only soul reapers with high clearances like us can duel this way. It is a big responsibility. It takes serious control not to hit too hard in the heat of battle, but Byakuya and I do this all of the time. We are well accustomed to the demands of it.

I finish a short Q & A with some young soul reapers and then look over to where Byakuya stands, making one last check on the reiatsu cage. That done, he carefully opens the entrance. We step inside and he carefully seals us in.

Inside, there is peace and quiet. I can almost forget the throng outside watching us. Byakuya made it that way to ensure our maximum concentration on the battle at hand. For all intents and purposes, we will act as though this is a private sparring session between just the two of us.

"That's good, Renji. Begin there with lots of space in between us," he says softly.

I nod and move into position. I slide Zabimaru free of his sheath. Byakuya paces off and takes position opposite me.

"Remember…it's just you and me…" he breathes.

It puts me into a relaxed and alert state perfect for sparring, but then, Byakuya is good at that.

"Begin," he says.

Because it is an exhibition, the first few moves are scripted. Everyone wants to see Byakuya's Senka. It is famous throughout the Sereitei…so as soon as we start, he is already flash stepping and I am already countering. Then we begin a heavy exchange of sword strikes before I pass my hand over Zabimaru, putting him in Shikai form.

"Roar Zabimaru!"

"Scatter Senbonzakura."

Our Shikai slam into each other, shaking the ground all around us and breaking against each other. We cannot see or hear the crowd in the gallery, but I know they've erupted into mad cheers of excitement. We may not receive sensations from without, but they can feel the rumbles of power from our battle and they hear our voices as well.

I don't have time to get distracted now, because as soon as the Shikai destroy each other, he treats me to a ferocious barrage of kido, sword, and petal blades that leaves tiny cuts cooling here and there on my skin. I am pleased when I notice that a few of my countering attacks have caught him as well.

We move into a dance of unscripted flash steps, strikes and kido, which ends only when I feel him raising his spirit energy for the release of his Ban Kai. We strike at each other with red and blue fire, white lightning and the six rod prison of light.

Before Byakuya can loose his Ban Kai, I begin my release.

"Ban Kai, Hihio Zabimaru!"

"Ban Kai, Scatter Senbonzakura Kageyoshi."

The skeletal snake rises around me and deflects the first nasty burst of petal blades, then follows the path of the blades to their source, forcing Byakuya to flash step away. He looses another battery and the skeletal snake curls around me protectively. Just before the petals fade, I send the skeletal snake at him, blasting him with the red flame from the serpent's mouth. Even though he is prepared for this, it yields a very impressive impact that sends both of us sliding backwards.

The fangs of the serpent strike at him, forcing him to flash step several times, then I send another blast from the serpent's mouth.

"Hikotsu Taiho!"

He counters with a withering blend of kido and Ban Kai that long ago, would have left my head spinning. It's still challenging, but I counter each move calmly and try to think a move ahead of him.

I am stunned, however, when I hear what he says next.

"Gokei, Senbonzakura Kageyoshi."

The petal blades form a huge sphere around Zabimaru and me. Once they have closed around us, I curl the skeletal snake around me for protection. The ones without don't know I have done this. They saw me separate from my Ban Kai just before the sphere closed. All at once, the sphere collapses and explodes in a brilliant flash of pink light, shaking the ground again. That has got to have scared the pants off a few of them! When the dust and blades disappear, the skeletal snake uncurls and I am none the worse for wear. We end the match there, returning our blades to sealed form and finishing things with a blinding speed relay of sword strikes that leave us as breathless as our audience. When Byakuya and I emerge from within the reiatsu cage, we are hammered with screams and applause that fall over us like a huge wave. I am all smiles and Byakuya's eyes flash with pride.

Byakuya and I flash step away to the 6th Division office to bathe and change before the banquet. The office is dark and empty, all of the division still being up at Sokyoku Hill, so no one is there to notice when we slip into the Captain's Quarters together.

When the two of us spar, we get very involved…and because we are lovers and life partners, it also tends to cause sudden bouts of intense lovemaking afterward. Usually we make it to the shower first, but sometimes we ignore the perspiration and go straight to bed. We spend a few minutes kissing and petting on the bed, before moving to the shower.

We step into the shower and let the hot water take away the sting of the small cuts on our skin. The Captain's shower has four shower heads, so we can stand almost anywhere in the large shower and still be pummeled with heated water. We take our time, washing away the dust and blood from the battle, then Byakuya turns and smiles at me.

"You did very well in our sparring, Renji. You performed quite admirably," he says, stepping in close, "In fact, you performed so well that I feel compelled to reward you in some way. How might I do that…Renji?"

He moves in close and captures my lips for a moment, then moves slowly down to my throat, tasting the water on my skin. I slide my hands down his water-slicked back and catch his hips, pulling them closer, urging them to press forward against mine. His fingers trace the tattoos on my skin and his mouth moves from my throat, down to my chest and lingers there, before he trails a line of kisses down to my navel. He sinks slowly to his knees, licking the water from my navel, then working his way downward from there. I was already aroused from the kissing and touches we gave each other before we got into the shower and this is like sweet torture. He takes his time tasting the skin on my thighs, and moving gradually lower. By the time he licks his way back upward, I am pressed back against the wall, gasping softly and trying as hard as I can to slow myself down.

I work my fingers into his hair to distract myself, then as he wraps his mouth around me, I moan and tighten my hands, encouraging him to move. He obliges me with a soft sigh and he doesn't pull away when I climax. I sink down to my knees in front of him and recapture his mouth in a slow, open-mouthed display of deep gratitude.

We finish showering and towel off. As he steps out of the bathroom, I follow, taking him into my arms from behind and bringing him down onto the bed. He turns in my arms and I kiss my way down his freshly washed skin and I give him the same loving attention he gave mine. Eventually, he pulls away, noting the time and speculating that if we delay any longer, we are going to be late. We dress quickly and head to the celebration hall, where we are surrounded by the noise and commotion of the crowd of soul reapers who have come to the exhibition day festivities.

Byakuya sits at the 6th Division table with the seated officers, while the non-seated members spread out at other tables around the room. Byakuya isn't one who enjoys a lot of noise and commotion, but he is caught up in the afterglow of sparring and lovemaking and it brings him out of his shell enough to converse briefly with many of the newer soul reapers, as well as several of the gathered captains. When the sun sinks into the horizon, we walk slowly home to Kuchiki manor and kiss the kids good night before falling into bed, ready for a good night's sleep.

Byakuya can barely keep his eyes open, but I always take longer to fall asleep, so he rests calmly against my shoulder, somehow managing to hold up his end of the conversation while I replay the day's events. Some time later, I yawn, stretch and pull him closer, then I sink into sleep, caressed by the softness of his breath on my skin.

XXXXXXXXXX

Usually, Byakuya is not a late sleeper, but this morning when I wake, he is still sound asleep, so I slip out of bed and dress, then move out into the garden for an outdoor breakfast. The children are up already. Takeshi toddles over to me and I lift him up and place a good morning kiss on his red hair. Chisaki follows Rukia around babbling incessantly. When breakfast is served, Byakuya is still not up. I poke my nose into our bedroom and he is still sleeping soundly. I figure that the exhibition and banquet were enough to wear anyone down and I go back out to play with the children.

It doesn't really start to worry me until it gets close to time for us to report for work. Byakuya might sleep in sometimes, but he always reports to work as expected. For him to still be sleeping now is a definite oddity.

I send the kids off to play with Rukia and I go back to our bedroom.

Byakuya is still lying where he was and in the same position as when I got up this morning. I start to get a little worried when I notice that his breathing seems a little off as well.

"Byakuya?" I say tentatively.

He doesn't move. That is extremely unlike him. The sound of his name usually rouses him.

"Bya," I say, touching his face.

The skin feels overly warm and his eyes open slightly, but they are tinged with redness and he seems overly drowsy.

"Renji?" he whispers.

"Yeah," I answer, pulling him up to a seated position, "You okay? It's almost time to leave for work. You going to get up today?"

"Did…you say…it's late?" he mumbles.

"Yeah, what is it? You sick or something?"

He runs his hands over his face to clear his head.

"I do feel a little…off. I probably overdid it yesterday. All of the commotion must have gotten to me."

"Yeah, I was a little out of it this morning too. But you look feverish. You should rest some more. I'll send a hell butterfly to tell Rikichi to run things this morning. That way I can make you some tea and look after you a little."

He squints up at me.

"Renji, I do not require looking after. I am simply overtired," he insists irritably.

"I know. But I like taking care of you, so I'll send that hell butterfly and I'll be back with the tea. You try to sleep a little, okay?"

He leans back and closes his eyes as I leave the room. It takes me a while to make the tea, so I'm not surprised to find him sleeping again when I come back. He is, as before, hard to rouse and noticeably sluggish. He seems to perk up a little after drinking the tea, but he opts to stay home for the rest of the day to rest.

"I'm just going to have lunch with Rikichi and a few new squad members," I tell him, "I'll be back after that.

He seems fine with it, so I flash step down to the division office to meet Rikichi and the others…then we adjourn to a nearby restaurant, where we spend some time getting to know the new squad members and introduce them to the way the division operates. As we work our way through lunch, my mind keeps drifting back to Byakuya. I have a hard time concentrating and I am relieved when lunch ends so I can return home.

When I get home, he is gone and the bed has been made. I look out in the garden and around the house before asking the housekeeper if he has been seen. She tells me that he walked out of the gate and up the trail towards the waterfall some time ago.

I flash step away and practically run out into the garden, past the gate and down the forest trail. When I reach the waterfall, I see him lying beneath the cherry trees. He is still feverish and slow to wake, but he climbs to his feet and we start back to the manor walking alongside each other.

"How was lunch?" he asks softly.

"Ah, it was good. It looks like we got a couple of promising members."

He nods his approval, but doesn't speak.

"Byakuya," I say worriedly, "maybe you should check in with squad four. I mean, it seems like you're really not yourself."

"I'm fine, Renji. I told you. I'm just overtired. I just need…"

He stops talking and sways unsteadily. I take hold of him and he seems to feel more settled. We start forward again.

"You're going to the Healing Center, Byakuya," I tell him, "You are definitely ill."

He doesn't say anything, but he nods in assent. We start forward, but a moment later, he collapses on the trail. Gasping softly, I drop down next to him, checking for his pulse and breathing,

"Byakuya!" I say urgently, "Bya! Can you hear me?"

He doesn't move. His chest is barely moving.

"Bya! Come on! Wake up!" I say louder.

I gather him into my arms and realize that his body is unresponsive. He is unconscious. Holding him close, I flash step back down the trail, through the house and across town to the Healing Center. I burst into the lobby with him held against me, still breathing, but not able to wake. Healers take him from my arms and they disappear into one of the rooms with him. My body shaking softly, I sit down in a nearby chair and resign myself to waiting.


	3. In the Night's Embrace

**Chapter 3: In the Night's Embrace**

I can't get rid of this sick feeling inside, waiting for someone to open the white door beside me, to come out and tell me that this was all a misunderstanding, that it is as Byakuya said, and that he is just overly tired. He does work very hard…and between the work of setting up the exhibition site, raising the negative reiatsu cage, sparring, making love, and attending the banquet, there was much there to tire him out. I know I was feeling it by the end of the day. That has to be all that this is. But, the time goes by and I continue waiting. I know that the longer it takes for that white door to open, the worse the news will be.

When it finally opens, Retsu Unohana meets my eyes wearily and she doesn't give me the smile that would tell me that Byakuya is going to be fine. There is a weight behind her eyes and my heart freezes with shock when she tells me what is happening.

"We don't know yet what is causing him to remain unconscious. We have tried all of the usual measures to bring him awake, and nothing seems to help. In addition, his reiatsu is in a declining state. We had to place him in a state of suspended animation to stop the rapid decline of his reiatsu."

He won't get any worse for right now. He won't die right now…but being in suspended animation? He won't wake.

They allow me to go inside to see him. I can't touch him, because suspended animation requires the placement of the soul into a special chamber. It sustains life while freezing the advance of whatever threatens to end that life. It is a desperate measure.

I rest my palms on the edge of the clear chamber and as I look down at his pale, beautiful face, I think back to yesterday, the excitement of battle, the heavy warm feeling of his body wrapped around mine, his breath on my skin, his deep, sensuous voice…and the fact that in all of my life, I have never loved anyone as deeply as I love him.

The door opens behind me and Rukia comes inside. She walks to me slowly and her arms wrap around me as we comfort each other.

"Yoruichi has arrived," she tells me in a tiny scared voice, "She's taking care of Takeshi and Chisaki so that we can stay here with him."

"That's good," I reply, looking back at her for a moment, "but it's not like we can do anything for him. Hell, we can't even touch him."

I'm suddenly reminded of the living world tale of Snow White…where the witch gives the girl a poisoned apple and she takes a bite and falls to the floor…and everyone thinks she is dead. They put her in a glass coffin and they're all crying over her, when suddenly the handsome prince arrives and gives Snow White a kiss. The kiss revives her and everyone lives happily ever after…well, everyone but the witch. But this is no fairy tale. I can't just open that translucent chamber, kiss him, and have him wake. He doesn't move. He isn't breathing. Like the princess in that human tale, he looks to all of the world as though he has died. We are incredibly lucky that suspended animation exists. Otherwise, Byakuya Kuchiki would already have ceased to exist.

The weight of that falls on me. If he weren't in suspended animation, he would already have died. I can't imagine what that would be like. I can't imagine the coldness of the morning without the warm weight of his body pressed against mine. I can't imagine never again feeling his breath touch my skin, his lips search for mine in the darkness, or his fingers trace the black tattoos that adorn my skin. I can't imagine sitting beneath the cherry trees at the top of the waterfall alone, knowing he'll never join me there, or being surrounded by cherry blossoms and knowing they'll never touch him again. I am scared to death.

Rukia stands beside me and I know she's as scared as I am. How many times have she and I stood together and mourned losses of life? In the Rukon District all of those years ago, this is what drove her to leave and become a soul reaper. I wonder what she will do if Byakuya dies? What will I do? How will I face the future alone? But then, we aren't alone. Rukia and I still have each other. I take her hand and we sit near him. She brings her head to rest on my shoulder. The room is silent. The prince sleeps. And we all wait for a miracle.

"I have to go back to the division office," I tell Rukia, "There are some things I have to be the one to do."

She nods and I leave her behind. I take one last look before closing the door behind me and leaving the white confines of the Healing Center.

I walk into the 6th Division office and the first thing that strikes me is how empty his chair looks, sitting there without him. I can't stand the thought of how cold it would feel to sit down and work there, so I take the pile of forms and return to my own desk. It doesn't take long for me to get things in order. When the reports are filed, I meet Rikichi and we move to the training ground. There are three new squad members. The first is a girl fresh out of the soul reaper academy. She is tall and willowy, with curly brown hair, laughing eyes and wicked kido. Her name is Ren and she is known to have scored highly in all areas except swordsmanship…so I know that's where we'll focus right away.

The second is a dark haired, studious boy named Fumio who is a pro at kido, but little else. He'll need lots of support to round him out, but we can definitely use those kido abilities right away. The last is a tall brown haired, brown-eyed boy named Takeo. He is a very strong fighter with good instincts. His kido is passable, but he is relatively hopeless in reiatsu sensing. Lots of strong fighters are. He has a pretty impressive Shikai, a shadow wolf form.

Rikichi and I put them through their paces, before sending them off to the barracks to settle in.

"So how is the captain doing?" Rikichi asks softly once we're back in the division office.

"They still don't know anything. They had to use suspended animation to keep him alive."

"Oh Renji!" Rikichi gasps, his face going pale, "I didn't know it was that bad!"

"Yeah…it is."

A hell butterfly appears and flutters softly down onto my fingertip.

"Renji Abarai, please report to the Healing Center for an update on the condition of Captain Kuchiki."

I flash step all of the way and find Rukia waiting outside Byakuya's door, her face pale and worried.

"I just got the hell butterfly," she says, "I don't know if that means he's better or worse."

We sit in chairs side by side near the door and hold hands as we wait for news. A few tense minutes later, the white door opens and Retsu Unohana comes out. She doesn't look as though the news will be great, but she doesn't look devastated or anything.

"We have managed to stabilize his reiatsu for now and he is awake. But Renji, we don't know what caused this to happen or if it will return. We haven't encountered anything like this before. We are keeping him for the night, but you both are welcome to see him."

We practically break the door down getting ourselves inside. Byakuya observes our frantic faces with calm amusement.

"Are you two all right?" he asks softly, "You nearly took that door off the hinges."

"Brother!" Rukia exclaims running to him and taking his hand, "We were so afraid for you! We didn't know what was wrong…or if you were going to be okay. We were very worried, Byakuya!"

"Well, I seem to be fine. I don't feel as though anything is wrong," he assures us, squeezing Rukia's hand gently, "Don't worry anymore, Rukia. I will be fine."

I am careful not to take away that impression while Rukia is there. But after she leaves to return to the manor, I drop the pretenses.

"Byakuya, they don't know why this happened. Now, you may be able to convince Rukia that everything is fine, but I know better. If they don't know why it happened and they don't know if it will come back, it means that if it does come back, they don't know how to stop it."

He lowers his eyes.

"Yes, Renji, there is no guarantee that it won't return…and because they couldn't identify it…it would be very troubling if it did return…but we won't do ourselves any good by worrying about it. Come, Renji. It is past dark already and I need to sleep. Come and help me fall asleep."

"Like you haven't slept enough already!" I exclaim, but I am quick to oblige.

I slip beneath the blanket and pull him close. Just this morning, I was wondering what I would do without this feeling and now it is back. I want it to stay. I never want this feeling to leave me. Byakuya nuzzles my shoulder and rests quietly. I can't sleep at all. I seem to hang on every breath all night. I hardly breathe as he sleeps, and when he wakes the next morning, I heave a sigh of relief and help him prepare to leave.

"Renji," he says quietly, "You're reiatsu is very disturbed, "I know you didn't sleep last night."

"Don't worry about me," I assure him, "I'm fine."

We walk slowly out of the Healing Center and back to the manor.

"Captain Unohana suggested a few days of rest," he says as we walk, "I'll need you to watch over the division for me."

I'm already shaking my head.

"Rikichi is perfectly capable of running things," I remind him, "He is really over-qualified for third seat, and you know it. I'm going to stay here and look after you."

"Renji, I told you that I don't require looking after," he insists, touching my hand.

"Yeah," I laugh sarcastically, "That was right before you collapsed…remember?"

His smile is warm, but his eyes look tired.

"Would you like some tea?" I ask softly.

"Yes, arigato, Renji. Tea would be good."

"Go get in bed," I tell him, giving him a gentle shove.

"Very well, Renji," he answers, his dark eyes glinting playfully, "Just don't keep me waiting."

I watch him turn slowly and the silk of his kimono whispers as he retreats down the hallway.

When I bring the tea to our bedroom, Byakuya is resting against the pillows with a calm dreamy look about his eyes. It's the way he looks when it's nighttime and we sit beneath the stars. I set the tea on the table beside him and watch as he raises the mug and takes a sip. He smiles his approval before setting the mug back down and falling back against the pillows. Keeping my eyes on him, I walk around the end of the bed and pull the covers back so that I can slip into bed next to him. He looks at me curiously, then wraps his arms around my shoulders. It is an embrace meant to give comfort.

"Renji, you're still worried…"

"Shouldn't I be?" I ask, searching the depths of his dark eyes, "I'm scared, Byakuya. And if you had any sense, you would be too. I don't want to get you all out of sorts, but I am scared. Do you want me to lie to you and say that I'm not?"

He places a warm hand on my cheek.

"I wouldn't ask you to do that. I've always loved your candid honesty, Renji."

Now he's really scaring me.

"Why are you talking to me like that?" I ask, my heart pounding painfully in my chest, "Is there something you're not telling me?"

He shakes his head and his eyes take on a gentle, apologetic shine.

"No…not in the way you're thinking. If Captain Unohana told me anything more about my condition, I would tell you, Renji. I promise that I won't hide anything. Even if it is bad news, I will be open with you."

"You think this isn't over," I say, and the affirmation is there in his eyes, "You think it will come back."

His breath releases in a slow sigh.

"I just feel something odd inside…that's all, Renji," he says, pulling me close, "but it won't do any good to worry about it. Just…stay with me. It comforts me to feel you near me this way."

His head rests on my shoulder and I feel the soft pulse of his reiatsu. He nuzzles my throat softly and then touches my face, bringing it closer to his for a light kiss. The contact is gentle and tentative, almost like that time so long ago in Inuzuri when he kissed me for the very first time. I want to go back there. I want to be anywhere but here, holding him and wondering if I'm going to lose him.

His face is still too warm and there is something in his eyes…a haziness, too much calm in his manner, even for him. Everything inside me is screaming for me to do something…to somehow stop the train wreck I see coming. But there is nothing I can do. This is out of our hands and we both know it.

"Don't be afraid, Renji," he whispers, "even if I were to die, I would still be with you. And know also that I do not fear death. What I fear is wasted time. So let's put this aside and use the time we have for something more enjoyable. We are not promised forever…only this moment. Let's not waste it."

I turn so that I'm leaning over him and I stare down into his black, misted eyes. I touch each eyelid with a soft kiss, then move on to claim his lips. Damn! They're still too warm. But they are alive and they move against mine hungrily. They part, inviting my tongue to dip into his mouth, to explore that beautiful place grown so familiar. But I can't enjoy this properly now. There is a weight to what is happening that makes my heart numb with fear. I'm clinging to his soft pale skin, hanging on for dear life. Kami, I don't want to lose this! I don't want this to go away.

"Let it go, Renji," he whispers, his lips brushing softly against my ear, "Don't do this to yourself. There's nothing to be gained by worrying."

He touches my face, bringing my eyes around to meet his steady, calm gaze. I stare for a long moment, then bring my mouth to his again. A few kisses later, my desperation starts to fade and I see relief in his eyes.

"That," he says, "is much better, Renji."

He reaches for the mug of tea and brings it to his lips. A moment later, his breath catches strangely and the mug drops from his hand.

"Byakuya?" I say, reaching for him, "Byakuya, what's happening?"

I catch him as he starts to fall back and ease him onto the pillows, my eyes locked on his. His gaze holds mine calmly for a moment longer and his mouth moves. A trembling hand reaches up to touch my cheek.

"Don't be afraid, Renji. It will be all right…"

His hand drops away and the dark eyes drift closed.

"Byakuya!"


	4. Not Fearing Love

**Chapter 4: Not Fearing Love**

_I drop down into a chair at Byakuya's bedside, looking down again into the translucent chamber, studying his frozen, time-stopped form._

"_I can't do this anymore," I moan softly, pressing my forehead to the side of it._

"_Renji," Rukia says, touching my shoulder, "Renji, what's happening to him?"_

"_I don't know," I reply, "No one seems to know."_

_The door opens and Yoruichi steps in. She glances at Rukia and me, then walks across the room and sits down beside Byakuya, studying him silently, her golden eyes glistening._

"_Captain Unohana asked us to stay here. She will be here in a moment to talk to us," she says, her eyes never leaving Byakuya._

_A few minutes later, the door opens and Captain Unohana comes in, followed by Hanatoro. Her face is calm, but very serious._

"_The tests we conducted on Captain Kuchiki's blood and reiatsu have come back. Both tell the same story. The symptoms he is experiencing are related to something that entered his system from the outside…something introduced within the last few days."_

"_Wait a minute," I say, staring up at her, "Are you telling me…that Byakuya has been poisoned?"_

_She nods._

"_Yes…that is exactly what I am saying. Sometime in the last few days, someone poisoned Captain Kuchiki."_

"_What kind of poison? How bad is it? Can you counteract it?" I ask, my words tumbling over each other in haste._

_Captain Unohana sighs._

"_We cannot determine the exact poison that was used. So until we do, we cannot counteract it. We do not know how bad it will get. Captain Kurotsuchi is currently researching all known poisons that cause the symptoms displayed by Captain Kuchiki. While we wait for news, all we can do is to manage the symptoms."_

"_Manage the symptoms?" I say sarcastically, "How do you manage falling into unconsciousness and declining reiatsu? You can't manage those symptoms."_

"_Actually," she says softly, "we can. But the question becomes…do we want to? Certainly, I can use a stimulant to wake him and keep him from losing consciousness. I can use reiatsu injections to bolster his reiatsu levels. But that assumes that he needs to be conscious and doing something."_

"_Captain Unohana…are you suggesting that we just leave him in that chamber?" I ask angrily, "Why? Why would you want to do that?"_

"_Think of it this way," Unohana says calmly, "If we manage the symptoms, but keep him conscious, the symptoms will get worse as the poison takes over. I will be forced to use more and more powerful methods to keep him on his feet, until finally the symptoms will no longer be controllable. If he remains in suspended animation, the poison's effects will halt and we will have time to search for a way to counteract it."_

"_Are there any dangers associated with being left in the chamber for an extended time?" Rukia asks softly._

_Unohana lowers her eyes._

"_Each time we use the chamber, there is an increasingly greater possibility that we will not be able to wake him."_

"_So we really can't leave him there while we figure this out," I conclude, "besides, Byakuya once told me that he and I are most vulnerable when we are separated…and he was right. We are going to need his input in this. This is his life we're talking about. He should have a choice."_

"_Renji is right," Yoruichi adds softly._

_Her voice sounds choked and when she looks up, there are tears staining her cheeks._

"_Byakuya should be the one to decide."_

_The three of us look at each other and nod slowly in agreement._

"_Very well," says Captain Unohana._

_She moves to Byakuya's side and opens the seal on the chamber. She injects him with reiatsu, and then with the stimulant. After a few minutes, he begins to moan softly and his eyes blink open. They meet mine and it seems to me that they hold on tightly as he fights to come to full awarness._

"_What is it?" he asks, his eyes holding mine, "What's happening?"_

"_You were poisoned, Captain Kuchiki," Unohana explains, "We don't yet know how, with what, or by whom. We need to make an important decision…and you should really be the one to decide."_

_He nods in acknowledgment._

"_Captain Kurotsuchi is conducting research to isolate and identify the poison. The stealth force is conducting an investigation of all persons having access to Captain Kuchiki in the past five days. I also want to test each of your family members and all household staff. I want to know if anyone else might be affected. And there is something else that you need to know. I was informed this morning that Captain Kuchiki is not the only one who has been poisoned."_

"_Who else was poisoned?" Byakuya asks._

"_Senbonzakura," Unohana answers solemnly, "Byakuya, you and your zanpakuto are slowly dying from this poison. It is possible for me to place you in suspended animation for the duration of the investigation. It would halt the advance of the poison, but it could result in the suspended state becoming permanent."_

"_And I am guessing," Byakuya says, his eye falling on Senbonzakura leaned against the wall, "that although I can be placed in suspended animation, my zanpakuto cannot?"_

"_That is correct," Unohana says softly._

_Byakuya nods._

"_I will have a fate no different than Senbonzakura's," he says softly._

_We're all absorbing Byakuya's answer when a hell butterfly arrives and settles lightly on Unohana's fingertip._

"_Captain Unohana," Kurotsuchi's voice says, "I have completed preliminary research on the samples you provided me and I can tell you a few things about the poison. First, I can tell you that it is a progressive poison…meaning that after the initial poisoning, this poison spreads throughout the infected organism, causing fatigue, malaise, loss of consciousness, and declining reiatsu. These effects will increase over time until they incapacitate and kill the organism. Secondly, the poison is of a class not of legal use in Soul Society because if it infects a soul reaper…it can also infect that soul reaper's zanpakuto. The zanpakuto will slowly begin to lose its connection with its wielder and if not counteracted, it will kill the zanpakuto as well. An interesting note. The samples you sent indicated that Captain Kuchiki was infected prior to the infection of his zanpakuto…and that he was exposed to the poison more than once. That being said, your first concern must be to locate the source of the infection. Once you do that, I will need you to try to collect a clean sample of the poison, if possible. I should be able to build a counteragent from that. Finally, you need to move quickly on this. Assuming he was infected in the past two or three days, Captain Kuchiki and his zanpakuto have about one week for us to come up with the counteragent!"_

_The hell butterfly flutters away. We all sit staring, no one quite knowing what to say. Finally, Yoruichi breaks the silence._

"_I am going to see Kisuke. Captain Unohana, if you could provide some samples, I could have Kisuke study them. He's very talented at this kind of thing."_

_Unohana nods._

"_Yes he is…And we would be fortunate to have his assistance."_

_She turns back to the rest of us._

"_Until we know more, I am going to recommend that Byakuya return home. I will provide medications to manage the symptoms. As soon as word comes about the investigation, I will summon you."_

_When we arrive at the manor, Byakuya turns toward the forest trail. I put a hand on his shoulder to stop him._

"_Where are you going? Shouldn't you be resting?" I ask._

_He gives me a calm stare._

"_Renji, the symptoms are under control, for now. I have done little but sleep for the past several days. I need to walk and reflect a bit."_

"_Is it okay if I come with you?" I ask._

_His eyes soften._

"_Of course, Renji. Please, join me…"_

_We make our way down the forest trail, wind blowing the sakura petals, making them spin in the air around us. His reiatsu is amazingly calm, considering he just got the news he only has about a week to live. _

_As we reach the end of the trail, we hear the hard crash of water against rock and the force of the impact leaves a fine mist in the air. Byakuya sits beneath one of the cherry trees at the top of the cliff. He leans back against the tree and I settle between his bent and spread knees with my back rested against his chest, my head leaned back against his shoulder. We rest there until darkness comes and the sky fills with stars. There is no moon tonight. He doesn't tell me any stories about the stars this time. We just sit beneath them, touched with their glow sharing each other's warmth in the cool of the night. Finally, Byakuya stirs._

"_I think they'll have dinner ready soon," he says, pulling free of me._

_He starts to get to his feet, but as he stands, he gives a sharp anguished gasp and drops down onto his hands and knees, his head lowered and his body shaking heavily._

"_Renji!" he hisses in a trembling voice._

_I drop down beside him and put an arm around him._

"_What is it? What's happening?" I ask._

_He looks up at me with haunted eyes that are quickly filling with tears._

"_Renji," he cries softly, "I can't feel Senbonzakura! He was there just a moment ago, but now…he's gone!"_

"_Hey," I tell him, pulling him close, "Captain Unohana said that it would happen over time. Don't panic. I'm sure this is just temporary. It wouldn't happen all at once like this. Shh, it's okay. It'll come back, I promise."_

_He clings to me, still shaking, but he breathes a little more deeply and settles gradually. A few minutes later, a tremor passes through him and he releases a sigh that sounds like a soft whimper._

"_You okay?" I ask, pulling back to look at him._

_His expression is a mixture of relief and exhaustion._

"_I'm okay now. I think you were right, Renji. It did come back. I knew it would happen. That part didn't surprise me…but I guess I wasn't expecting it so soon. I'm sorry if I frightened you with my reaction."_

_I hold him tightly against me._

"_Don't you worry about me. You just worry about yourself and Senbonzakura. I wasn't frightened. I was just worried about you."_

"_Arigato, Renji."_

_He slowly stands, bending to brush the dust off of his clothes. We walk slowly back to the manor, not saying anything, We say little at dinner and eat even less, then we slip into bed and lie there for a long time just holding each other quietly. Finally, he sighs softly and turns in my arms._

"_Renji?" he says, looking up into my eyes, "Do you remember the first time we made love?"_

"_Yeah, of course I do. As I recall, you were ready to run. You said you didn't want to fall in love with me."_

"_Because…for me, love equals loss. I said those words…but that wasn't what was in my heart. I wasn't being honest with myself, Renji. I tried to tell myself that I would rather die than feel the love that I was feeling for you. It was because I was afraid. I spent so much time being afraid that I would lose you. That was wasted time, Renji. Loving you was never something I needed to fear."_

_His lips brush mine and pull away again._

"_I choose to believe that you and I are going to come out of this okay. But I need to know that you believe it too. Because, I know if we both believe in it…then it will happen that way."_

"_Well, I do believe it will be okay."_

"_Good," he whispers, brushing his lips against mine again, "Now I want you to do something for me, Renji."_

"_Anything, Byakuya. I'll do whatever you ask."_

"_Make love to me."_

_It strikes me all of a sudden how quiet everything has gotten. I can't hear the wind in the trees or the trickle of water in the koi pond. There's a deep silence that seems to start inside me and it creates a barrier all around. I hear what he asked me to do, but I feel frozen…cold…alone. It's like he's here, but at the same time, he isn't. And I wonder for a moment, if I try to reach out and touch him, will he disappear? He's looking into my eyes like he understands exactly what I'm thinking. He touches my face and smiles._

"_Don't be afraid to love me, Renji. That fear is a waste of time…and this time is precious. Make love to me, Renji."_

_He does understand._

_He knows._

_Because he's been here before…only now it's him who is dying…and I'm being left behind._

_I touch his hair and I try to remember the first time it touched my skin. It was a few days after I became his vice captain. I asked a question and when he turned his head, his hair brushed against my hand. Even before I loved him, I knew how soft it was. I longed even then to sink my fingers into it. I kiss his forehead, his eyes, his open mouth. He moans softly into my mouth, sliding his hands down my back and pulling my hips in closer. His hands push open my kimono and trace the dark lines like they have a thousand times, but this time his touch burns. My lips brush against his pale throat and he tilts his head back, moaning my name_

_Suddenly, I want to touch every inch of him. I want to explore every curve, every bit of softness…everything! So I run my hands over his body, curling then gently around his head, threading my fingers through his hair, stroking his face, then letting soft kisses follow those searching hands all over his body._

"_Renji…" he whispers, "Renji…"_

_His thighs part and I sink down in between them. I bury my face in his throat, kissing, stroking with my tongue and sucking gently as I slowly enter him. I stop for a moment…long enough to capture his beautiful dark eyes. Then I move slowly…like I did that first time, when we fell in love…in Inuzuri. He moves with me, his eyes locked on mine, his hands sliding down to my hips, and his lips curving upward in a sweet contented smile. I know we're moving faster, that the sensations are becoming more intense, but everything keeps that soft feeling of slow motion, even so. I feel his hands grip my shoulders and his hip rise up sharply against mine. The rough feeling of him moaning and panting against my shoulder sends me reeling and I release deep inside him. I stay buried inside him for a long time after, stroking his face and hair, and indulging in a light play of kisses all over his face and throat._

_I wait until he has drifted off to sleep before I let the tears fall._


	5. Poisoned Kisses

**Chapter 5: Poisoned Kisses**

_The medication Captain Unohana gave Byakuya must work well, because the next morning he is up at his normal time and out in the garden with Takeshi and Chisaki. Byakuya is lying on his stomach in the grass face to face with Takeshi, sprinkling grass into his red hair, then blowing it gently away as our little warrior gives a series of sharp battle cries. Chisaki has taken a position on his back and has pretty much fallen asleep. Now and then, she makes a soft cooing sound._

_I stumble out into the garden and sit nearby, watching them silently. I feel Byakuya's eyes come to rest on me several times and finally, he calls me on it._

"_Renji, stop looking at me as though I'm going to disappear. The medication is helping. I actually feel quite good today. Why don't we take the kids down to the base of the waterfall to play in the water?"_

"_Sure, Bya," I answer, not really hearing him, "whatever you want."_

"_Da…da…da…bya" says Chisaki, petting his hair._

"_Now look what you've done!" he says smiling, "You've got her calling me that too!"_

_He notices that I don't really react and gently pulls away from the kids. Chisaki takes offense and raises a fuss. He picks her up and she laughs._

"_Da…da…da…bya…"_

"_Renji…you seem quite distracted. I understand…really, but, we should try to do something to improve your mood."_

"_Please don't suggest sparring!" I moan, allowing a smile to form._

"_No? Perhaps not. How about work?"_

_Okay, that's just confusing right now. If I can't focus on fun with the kids, how am I going to focus on work?_

"_I don't know," I answer noncommittally._

"_I haven't spent any time with the new squad members yet. They're going to be on the training ground later. We could make a brief visit."_

"_Sure, okay."_

_Rukia and Yoruichi walk out into the garden and take the kids into the house for a nap. Byakuya disappears back into the house and returns in uniform…looking for all intents and purposes like it is any other day. _

"_Come, Renji, we need to get out and get our minds working."_

_I don't answer, but I get up and walk with him out the front of the house and through the busy streets to the 6__th__ Division training ground. Rikichi is already there with the new squad members. As we walk onto the grounds, Rikichi is in the midst of releasing his eagle Shikai and showing the new members his special ability, then he tells them to practice Shikai while the three of us observe. The new kids are petrified, of course, when they see Byakuya, but he is quick to put them at ease. He turns to watch as Takeo releases his shadow wolf form and smiles in approval._

"_That is a powerful Shikai," he says, looking at the young man who wields it._

_Takeo smiles back at him in gratitude._

"_Thank you, Captain Kuchiki," he says, blinking as though he's a little stunned to actually be talking to Byakuya._

_He pauses, gathering his nerve, then speaks to Byakuya again._

"_Sir, could you show us your Shikai? I've never seen it up close before."_

_Ren and Fumio move to join us as Byakuya nods and draws his sword. I pace off a few steps and release Zabimaru for my protection._

"_Scatter, Senbonzakura," Byakuya intones._

_As I watch, I notice a distinct pause and Byakuya winces. Then the sword releases and the petal blades sweep across the training ground to break against Zabimaru. The new squad members look mesmerized. He spends a few more minutes talking with them and then they leave to return to the barracks with Rikichi. As I return to his side, I notice he is sweating a bit and he looks little uncomfortable._

"_Are you okay?" I ask._

"_Yes, Renji," he says quietly, "but…I don't know if you noticed, but Senbonzakura did not release properly."_

"_I saw that," I acknowledge._

_He is about to say more when a hell butterfly arrives._

"_Captain Kuchiki, please report to the 4__th__ Division for a reading of medical test results."_

_We flash step off to the Healing Center. Captain Unohana takes us into a private room and we wait as she gathers the results to show us._

"_First, I need to know…is the medication helping?" she asks._

_Byakuya nods._

"_Yes, I feel quite good today. But Senbonzakura is a bit out of sorts. I had trouble releasing Shikai earlier."_

"_Yes, well we were expecting that. If you are feeling well, then we don't need to adjust the medication yet. Now, as to the report from the stealth force. They have completed background checks on all who had direct contact with Captain Kuchiki in the past five days and have not turned up anyone we would deem dangerous to him. No one seemed connected to him in anything but a positive way. So we still don't know who did this or why. But we did turn up something of extreme importance. That's why I called you here. This just came in from Captain Kurotsuchi. I sent him the samples of reiatsu from family members and household staff. One result came back very odd."_

_She pauses._

"_Renji…apparently, you and your zanpakutou are carriers of the poison."_

_Byakuya and I stare at her, but neither of us can speak at first._

"_What do you mean?" asks Byakuya finally, "How can Renji carry the poison? He isn't ill."_

"_No," Captain Unohana says softly, "He isn't ill because the manner of this poison's distribution is very odd. It is first used to affect a host organism, then it launches attacks on another using the host as a means."_

"_What? You mean I can spread this? Bya, what if I…"_

"_Easy, Renji, listen. No one else in your family nor anyone else will be affected."_

"_And how do you know this?" Byakuya asks._

"_I know this because we found that the poison in your system attaches to one other organism and attacks it repeatedly until the organism is destroyed. It is an illegal compound used by nefarious groups as a tool for assassination."_

"_You said that it attacks the other repeatedly," I say, my heart numb, "You're saying that I poisoned Byakuya…not just once, but over and over? How?"_

_Unohana sighs._

_It appears to have been passed to Byakuya through direct physical contact…most probably, kissing."_

"_Kami!" I whisper, the shock making my legs weak, "I poisoned Byakuya?"_

"_That is not all," she goes on, "It appears that Senbonzakura was poisoned during the exhibition, when the two of you sparred and your weapons were in direct contact. The nature of this attack is very deliberate. Someone wanted to kill Byakuya and they wanted you to be the means for doing that."_

_I drop into a chair and Byakuya puts a hand on my shoulder. I can't help but pull away. He looks down at me with deep concern._

"_So what does this mean for us, Captain?" Byakuya asks, his eyes still fixed on mine._

"_It means that to avoid further poison transfer, we must eliminate the poison in Renji and Zabimaru."_

"_Is that possible? And if so, why can't you do something to cure Byakuya?"_

"_Renji and Zabimaru are carriers. The poison is actually suspended on them as opposed to within them. It can be removed. We have technology here that can do this. But Byakuya has been fully affected. In him, this poison must be counteracted."_

"_I still don't understand why it hurt him but not me."_

_Unohana shakes her head sadly._

"_As I said, it was designed for the specific purpose of assassination and has only rarely been used. To counteract it, we need a pure sample. I am hoping we can take one while we remove the poison from Renji and Zabimaru."_

"_Then do it," I tell her, "Remove it right now."_

_She nods._

"_Come with me, Renji."_

_I get up to follow her. As we walk out the door, I notice Byakuya staring out the window, a lost look in his dark eyes._

_We're wondering the same thing. Who would hate him this much?_

_XXXXXXXXXX_

_"Are you all right?" Byakuya asks as we walk back towards home, "That can't have been easy for you to hear, Renji."_

"_No…I'm not all right, Byakuya!" I say angrily, "I poisoned you! I did this to you! How in the hell am I supposed to deal with that?"_

_He puts a hand on my arm. I jerk away._

"_Renji…" he says softly, "don't…"_

"_Don't what? Damn it, Byakuya, someone used me to poison you! I personally handed you a death sentence. I can't…wrap my mind around that…"_

_Tears threaten, but I blink them away. Byakuya steps closer and takes my face in his hands._

"_You did not hurt me."_

"_What the fuck? You heard what she said, Byakuya! And you know what kills me? You know what really tears me up? It's…it's that while we were making love…I was killing you!"_

_Byakuya puts his arms around me. I try to pull away, but he holds me so that I can't._

"_I can't stand this, Byakuya, I can't! I can't stand the thought that if you die, I'm the one who killed you!"_

_His eyes are clear and calm. He leads me along the street and back home. I'm too caught up in this awful feeling to pay attention. I can't believe I was used to hurt him like that. I thought it was bad before, when Sosuke Aizen used me to…_

"_Byakuya," I say suddenly, brushing the tears out of my eyes, "Do you think that Sousuke Aizen did this?"_

_He considers it for a moment._

"_Actually, Renji, I don't think so. Sousuke Aizen has long sought to gain control of my power. He never really indicated a desire for my death."_

"_What's really odd is that no one has contacted you. I mean, wouldn't they want you to know they were behind this…at least to tell you the reason why?"_

"_It is odd, but not unheard of, Renji," he answers quietly, "Perhaps the person is waiting for a certain time to reveal things. Perhaps he or she will begin to reveal his or her identity soon."_

"_I hope so," I say, trying to keep new tears from forming, "I want to kill the bastard who would use me against you like this, Byakuya!"_

_He turns and reaches for me. A look of surprise crosses his face when I step back. There is a long silence between us. There is hurt in his voice when he speaks again._

"_Renji, Captain Unohana assured us that the poison is gone from your system now. There is no added danger to concern ourselves with. Why do you keep doing that?"_

"_I don't know, Byakuya. I don't know. I just…after what I did…"_

_He closes the distance and doesn't let me pull away._

"_Renji," he says softly, "You are only allowing whoever did this to attempt to separate us in another, faster and even more painful way. Don't withdraw from me like that. I can handle the thought of dying. I can't handle the thought of you distancing yourself from me."_

_I can't look at his eyes. That really hurt him. It seems I'm only improving in my ability to do that._

"_Byakuya…I don't want to be distant…but…I can't stand the thought that me loving you could kill you."_

"_Renji…please hear me. This is not your fault. I don't know what else to say, but since you seem to need some space, some time to think things through, I won't pressure you. I will…be here at home when you are ready to…return."_

_He turns and flash steps away._

_I walk aimlessly down the streets of the Sereitei, my mind spinning. I can't focus. All of my thoughts mix together and I can't center myself. I lose track of things for a while and I find myself walking out the main gates of the Sereitei…into the Rukon District. I keep going even after night falls. I don't stop until I reach Inuzuri. I find the old tree I used to sleep in and climb up into the branches. The rough bark feels comfortable and familiar. It's not long before the memories carry me off to sleep._

_XXXXXXXXXX_

_"Captain Kuchiki, what are you doing here?" asks Rikichi as I enter the office, "You were supposed to be taking a few days off."_

"_Technically, I am," I tell him, but I'm not accustomed to being out of the office so much. I just thought I'd catch up on a few things."_

_I notice then that the new squad members are gathered around Renji's desk and Rikichi has obviously been discussing battle tactics and procedures. As I look over at them, I notice that Takeo is looking back with an odd expression. As soon as he sees I am looking back, the odd look is replaced by a more awed, pleased expression._

_I work quietly for a while before Takeo appears at my side with a cup of tea._

"_Rikichi said you like it prepared this way," he says, setting the tea down._

"_Arigato, Takeo," I say, taking the tea and sipping, "You managed it very well."_

"_Arigato, Captain, sir," he says, then he returns to Rikichi._

_I continue to work, but my mind keeps straying back to Renji. I know his reiatsu feels far away. As the workday ends and everyone begins to leave, I start to dislike the quiet that closes in around me. Soon everyone has gone home and I am alone, working late into the night, aware that Renji still has not returned. I begin to feel a loneliness that I thought I had left behind, but with Renji withdrawn and far away, it returns with a vengeance._

_I try digging deeper into my work, but fatigue is sweeping through me and soon I sit back, sighing, knowing I should really go home…but home isn't home without Renji there. I could cope better if he was out on assignment, but the truth is, it hurts that he left and hasn't returned. But he was devastated. I can't blame him for being shell-shocked. I tell myself again that he'll be back soon, that he will work his way through and everything will be all right._

_I am still trying to convince myself of this, when suddenly Senbonzakura's reiatsu pulses sharply, sending a jolt through my body that makes my mind spin. I pull the sword free and try to connect with the spirit within. There is no answer, just a confused mix of sensations and a feeling of terror. I try to send calm reiatsu through the blade's length, but I sense that it isn't reaching the sword's spirit. As I make another frantic attempt, I am stunned to see the blade dissolve into petal blades. I reach out to control them, but they do not respond to my thoughts. They spin madly and out of control, sending papers flying and closing in on me. The last thought I have before they reach me is that Renji is so far away, he might not realize what has happened._

_XXXXXXXXXX_

_It is nearly midnight, when I wake in the tree and notice that I feel cramped and cold. I feel better for having slept, but I know I should really go back home. Whatever the circumstances, Byakuya needs me. I shouldn't be out here feeling sorry for myself while he is at home, alone and sick. I feel bad for even leaving, but his words warm me._

"_I will be here at home when you return."_

_It's time to do that. In truth, I shouldn't have left._

_I drop down out of the tree and notice that a cloud of mist is all around me. It gives me a creepy feeling of memory. It's like it was back then._

"_Kasumi…" I whisper._

_I hadn't thought about it for so long before that dream I had. It's strange that I came here tonight. I wonder at that. What is going on? As I turn to leave, I hear the crunching of feet on the ground behind me. I turn to look…and I am still alone. Strange. It almost felt like she was there for a second._

_I turn towards home. I have barely taken the first few steps when I feel the raging of Senbonzakura's reiatsu. Byakuya's rises as well. There is the shocking sensation of the two forces crashing against each other…then both sets of reiatsu decline sharply. I flash step toward the Sereitei fast enough to challenge Byakuya's speed._


	6. Return to Inuzuri

**Chapter 6: Return to Inuzuri**

"_Captain Kuchiki?" says a soft, feminine voice._

_My eyes blink open and try to focus. Retsu Unohana's face slowly materializes in the haze around me._

"_Thank goodness," she says, relief in both her voice and the pretty blue eyes that meet mine, "You gave us a little fright there…but it looks like you'll be fine."_

_Something feels very wrong. She sees the expression on my face and her smile fades._

"_Ah…I'm sorry, Captain. I had to put a seal on you zanpakuto. It was out of control. It destroyed your office and the two of you clashed with a great deal of force. You are fortunate that you were still strong enough to fend off its attack."_

"_What happened to Senbonzakura?" I ask, my heart skipping painfully._

"_I will be honest with you, Byakuya. Your zanpakuto is experiencing great amounts of stress. The poison is affecting it with greater force than it is affecting you. I fear that your zanpakuto could soon reach a critical juncture. We must find a way to counteract this poison soon…or your zanpakuto will die."_

_Her words are still sinking in when the door bursts open and Renji charges into the room. There is something about the frantic look in his eyes and on his face, the fact he almost took the door off the hinges, and the way he throws his arms around me so tightly. It gives a sense of strength back to me._

"_Kami, Byakuya, I felt your reiatsu and Senbonzakura's clash and decline, and I thought that you two had killed each other!"_

"_I…I'm fine, Renji, really. I was able to shield myself. I lost consciousness, but I'm fine now, really. It's Senbonzakura that is failing right now. I'm afraid my zanpakuto is dying more quickly than I am. They had to put a seal on it…for everyone's protection."_

_He's still holding me very tightly and his eyes still look panicked. I sink into the embrace for the warmth and the comfort I was missing before._

"_I really missed you, Renji. I know you needed time to process things, but it was…empty here without you."_

"_I know," he says, putting his hands on my face, "and I shouldn't have gone. I just felt so bad that I'd been used to hurt you. I couldn't stand that feeling. I'm sorry I ever left. It won't happen again, I promise! But…Byakuya…you said you lost consciousness. How did you get here?"_

"_I don't know, actually," I admit, "I only just woke up."_

"_It was one of your squad members," Captain Unohana explained, "He's waiting outside. He was very worried about you, Captain Kuchiki."_

"_Very well," I tell her, "He may come in. I would like to thank him."_

_She leaves the room and a moment later, the door opens and Takeo comes in. He looks a bit shaken and he still seems intimidated by me._

"_Takeo," I say softly, "I understand that I have you to thank for finding me and calling for assistance."_

"_Sir…I…I'm glad you're okay. But, sir, what happened? It was your zanpakutou, wasn't it?"_

_I am not ready for this to become common knowledge._

"_It…was an accident. It has been taken care of…arigato."_

"_But, Captain…I saw it. I saw Senbonzakura attack you! Why would your zanpakutou attack you?" he asks, wide-eyed._

"_I have been ill…and that affected my zanpakutou somehow. But do not concern yourself with that. Just know that I appreciate your swift response…"_

"_I do have a question," Renji says, pulling away from me, "What were you doing there in the office so late?"_

"_Oh, that! I just…had to go back because I…I forgot my zanpakutou. I was embarrassed, because, you know, who the heck forgets something like that, right? So I slipped back in to get it…and I saw Senbonzakura attack the captain," he explains._

"_Ah, well, Takeo," I say, "it is very late…and as you see, I am fine now. You should report back to the barracks and get some sleep. I understand that Rikichi is having you work on kido tomorrow."_

"_Yes sir. I'm glad you're okay, sir." He says, before turning and leaving the room._

_I sit quietly for a moment as Renji approaches and slips his arms around me again. I lean against his shoulder, thinking. He looks closely at me._

"_Byakuya, what's on your mind? You look like something is troubling you. I mean, besides the obvious."_

"_Renji…Takeo was lying…about his zanpakutou," I say finally._

"_He was lying?" Renji repeats questioningly, "What do you mean? How do you know?"_

"_I know because I saw him come in. It happened very quickly…but I remember…Renji, he was wearing his zanpakutou when he came in."_

"_But why lie about that?" Renji asks softly, "Byakuya, you don't think he has anything to do with the poisoning, do you?"_

"_I'm a long way from knowing the answer to that, Renji," I admit, "But we should follow any possibilities."_

"_But, Byakuya, the stealth force determined he had no connection to you. He wasn't considered a danger."_

"_Yes," I agree, "I was just thinking about that. Renji, what if we were wrong about the central target in all of this? What if it wasn't me that was the target…but you?"_

"_Me? Why would anyone target me? I don't understand," Renji objects, "And why poison you if I was the target?"_

"_Again, we are a long way from having those answers, but now we can at least pursue this. Renji, I want you to go personally to Captain Soi Fon and request a complete background on Takeo. I want to know where he grew up, who he is associated with, and if he has any connection, not just to me, but to you."_

"_Okay…but what do we do with the kid in the mean time? Should we confine him?"_

"_No…no, I think not. Renji, it is doubtful that one such as he could be working alone in this. How would he come into possession of that substance? How would he even be aware of it? He is connected to someone with a great deal of power. We need to find out who that person is."_

"_So what are you suggesting?" Renji asks._

"_I think that we need to let him get closer to me."_

"_Uh, Byakuya, don't forget, this kid might be the one who poisoned you. Why would you let him close to you. What if he decides to attack you?"_

"_I doubt that will happen, Renji. I think that if he was sent to poison me, he may just be watching to be certain I die…but if that is the case, then why would he help me? There is so much we don't know. I think if I let him close to me, he may give something away."_

"_It sounds dangerous, Byakuya. I don't like the idea of you letting a murderer get that close to you."_

"_Well," I remind him, "I am already dying…and the ones who poisoned me seem content to wait for it to work."_

"_That's quite a risky assumption. I mean it's great if you're right, but what if seeing him close to you makes them want to speed things up?"_

"_I think that's a risk we have to take. Tomorrow I'll send orders that Takeo is to attend me. We will watch his movements and see what we find."_

"_Captain Unohana, is Byakuya well enough to come home?" Renji asks._

"_Yes," she says, nodding, "Just remember to rest and please, do not remove the seal on Senbonzakura."_

"_I will not," I promise her, but my heart aches thinking of my zanpakutou locked away and dying alone._

_I, at least, have Renji._

_We leave the Healing Center and start back toward home. As we near the 6__th__ Division office, something occurs to me._

"_Renji, I just thought of something. If Takeo wasn't in the office to retrieve his zanpakutou, then why was he there? What was he there to do?"_

"_That's a good question, Byakuya."_

"_Should we, perhaps, visit the office to see if he might have decided to return?"_

"_Good idea," Renji agrees._

_We go to the back entrance into the Captain's Quarters and slip quietly into the hallway. Soft sounds issue from the dark office ahead of us._

"_Someone's working late," Renji whispers, "and without light."_

_I nod and move toward the partially open door, carefully peering around it. Sure enough, Takeo is in the office. He appears to be carefully searching Renji's desk. I put a hand on Renji's arm so that he won't give us away, and we watch as Takeo searches the desk, then sighs in frustration. He starts to move toward where we are concealed, so we slip back into the Captain's Quarters and softly close the door. We hear him enter the hall, then we hear a small scraping and some soft clicks._

"_Lockpick," I mouth to Renji._

_There is a larger click and then the sound of the door into the Vice Captain's Quarters opens and closes. I turn to Renji._

"_Renji," I whisper, "obviously, you have something that he wants to obtain. If he does not find it here, I think we should definitely have him come to the manor to attend me. He will undoubtedly attempt to search for whatever it is there. We can trip him up and find out what his mission is. But we must be careful. Assuming there is someone very powerful behind all of this, if we let them know we suspect Takeo, they could take more drastic measures."_

"_Like trying to kill you sooner…"_

"_Or killing you."_

"_Bya…we need to get the kids somewhere safe."_

"_Yes," I agree, "I am certain Yoruichi will have no problem watching over them in Karakura Town. We shall send them off first thing in the morning."_

"_Okay," says Renji, "but what do we do now? I think I heard him come out of my quarters. Do we try to follow?"_

"_Yes, come."_

_We peek into the hallway and see Takeo's retreating back. We wait until he turns the corner, then silently flash step to the corner and follow at a safe distance. We are cautious because we notice him looking around quite a bit. He walks down several dark streets, then slips into a bar. _

_I turn to Renji and pull out his hair tie._

"_What the…Bya, what are you doing?"_

"_Shh, I'm going incognito," I say, removing the kenseiken and pulling my hair back, fastening it with Renji's hair tie._

_I remove the scarf, wrist guards and haori as well, handing these to Renji._

"_I am less recognizable than you without these," I tell him softly._

_He nods._

"_Just be careful, Byakuya. You don't know who he might be meeting…only that he might work for someone powerful."_

_I nod briefly, then slip into the bar. It is late, but not too late for revelry and that means that the bar contains a lot of people. It makes it a lot easier to blend in…and the darkness of the interior works in my favor. It seems that I am not recognized._

_I move carefully around the room until I spot Takeo sitting quietly at a booth, looking as though he is waiting for someone. I see a booth near him is unoccupied and slip into it. A few minutes later, I hear someone greet Takeo and I turn for a quick glance. I do not recognize the man, but I memorize his features carefully. Then I listen._

"_Did you find it, kid?"_

"_No sir." Takeo says in an intimidated voice, "I searched very carefully. It wasn't in his desk at the division or his quarters."_

"_We need to get someone into the manor. Can you do that, or do we need to remove you from this?"_

"_I can do it. I can," Takeo tells him, sounding frightened, "Just…I will do it tomorrow."_

"_Very well," says the other, "You have until tomorrow night or we will assume you are not capable. Raiden is not a patient man. He wants that information back in our hands."_

"_I don't know why it matters," comments Takeo in a small voice, "It has been many years and they are in Hueco Mundo, so why worry about who has that information?"_

_The larger man grabs the younger by the front of his shirt._

"_We still have people here who will be exposed. We have to get back the information she stole. We know it never reached the Sereitei and he was the last one she saw. He must have hidden it somewhere. Find it, worm…"_

"_I…I will!" Takeo gasps, "I promise!"_

_The man shoves him backwards and turns away, disappearing out the front door. Takeo moves to go out the back door. I move to the front and follow the one who Takeo had spoken to. He walks down to the end of the street and turns. I flash step after him and I feel Renji join me. We follow him down several dark streets, careful to keep our distance, but eventually, he reaches the main gate and heads out into the Rukon District._

"_Should we keep going?" Renji asks me._

_I signal for him to continue to follow. The one we follow takes a circuitous route that suggests that he is being very cautious. We realize after a time that he is headed toward Inuzuri. We follow until he reaches a dark warehouse. I grab Renji's arm and pull him down behind some bushes, pointing up to a lookout, who just misses spotting us._

"_Perhaps this is some sort of illegal group. This may be their headquarters. We have to be careful, Renji. We need to have members of the stealth force monitor this building and we need to see what we can get out of Takeo. We need to know what they think you have."_

"_Did you find out anything at the bar?" Renji asks._

"_A little. He is looking for something that a man named Raiden thinks that you were given by someone who is female. It was supposed to have happened some time ago. I do not know where or under what circumstances. It is information that is somehow connected to Sousuke Aizen, because they made references to those now in Hueco Mundo. This may be some kind of covert group of his operating here. It sounds as though the information includes names of Aizen's operatives who are still in Soul Society. We need to…"_

_All at once, my head begins to spin and my heart pounds strangely. I feel unconsciousness coming on and I hold on to Renji as his arms surround me and ease me to the ground._

"_I'll take you to Michi," he says as things go dark._

_When I wake, I find myself tucked warmly into a comfortable bed with Renji at my side._

"_You okay now, Byakuya?" he asks, "I told Michi about the poison and he seemed to know what to give you. I guess it worked."_

"_Yes," I say softly, "I do feel better now."_

"_Well, we're staying here tonight, so don't get any ideas about running off."_

"_I have no intention of running off!" I tell him indignantly, "I have every intention of spending this night right here in your arms, Renji."_

"_What's left of the night…" he comments, pulling me close._

_My mouth finds his in the darkness. At first, he seems tentative, but I tease his lips gently until they part. My tongue strokes his gently and I press closer. We both know the truth of things is that I am weakening. At this point, I'm not up to much more than exchanging kisses and gentle touches, so we content ourselves with that until sleep finally overtakes us._


	7. With Eyes Opened

**Chapter 7: With Eyes Opened**

_I'm always more inclined to sleep late than Byakuya and we were awake the greater portion of last night, so it is late in the morning before I come awake again. Byakuya's body still rests heavily against mine and he is deeply asleep._

_"Byakuya," I say, stroking his face gently, "C'mon, wake up. We need to go home."_

_He doesn't move. I feel a stab of fear._

"_Byakuya," I call, rubbing his wrists._

_There is no response. I try to wake him gradually with kisses, but I quickly realize that he is, once again, unconscious. I go to find Michi who confirms this and immediately sends for Captain Unohana._

"_This poison is very strong and Byakuya is held tightly in its grip, now. Even though her stronger power will wake him, you must know that his time is running out," Michi tells me._

"_Damn! We were just getting to the point where we were finding some answers. Michi, I need his help. I don't know if I can figure this out on my own."_

_He puts a comforting hand on my shoulder._

"_She will wake him and get him on his feet again. Between us all, we will give him the strength to fight for his life. Trust in that."_

"_But there is so much to do, Michi. I have to know why that group targeted me…what they think was given to me…and by whom. I need to know why they used me to poison Byakuya like that. That part wasn't just about this information they want. It was personal…like payback."_

"_I know the group that occupies the warehouse, Renji," Michi states quietly, "I will tell you what I know, but then you must not fail to shut them down, because they will learn I have told you about them…and I will disappear in the blink of an eye. They are dangerous, Renji. I think you know now just how dangerous they are."_

_I can't help but stare in surprise. But Michi has lived here in Inuzuri for so many years…it makes sense._

"_Renji, back before Suosuke Aizen left the Sereitei, he gathered a group of soul reapers together to set the groundwork for his rise to power. They handled many different kinds of tasks for him. They went out searching for support amongst the soul reapers and here in the Rukon District…even among the hollow. It shows how far he was willing to go to gain power. They also prepared hideouts and gathered intelligence for him. The head captain became aware of this group's activities and sent a special agent to infiltrate the group and to bring back information on its activities and personnel. That agent's name was Kasumi."_

"_What the hell?" I gasp, "Not…"_

"_Yes…she wasn't what she seemed at all, Renji. She was carefully concealed. She looked just like a Rukon teen given to prostitution. That's what everyone was supposed to think. But she was a carefully placed agent…and she was the best, Renji. She infiltrated the group as planned and she gathered information over several months, which she compiled and stored on a special computer chip. She placed this inside a blue pendant she always wore and she was supposed to deliver it to her associate to take to the head captain."_

"_I remember the pendant," I say softly, "It disappeared the day she died."_

"_Yes, it did. This is where the story gets complicated. The group she infiltrated was led by a man close to Aizen named Raiden. During the course of the mission, Raiden fell in love with Kasumi, but she was not in love with him."_

"_Wait…if she wasn't a prostitute and she wasn't seeing this guy, that means that the child she was having was…"_

"_Yours, Renji. The child was yours. Raiden found out she was pregnant and demanded to know who fathered the child. She wouldn't tell him. She ran and stayed with you. But they tracked her down and they thought they killed her."_

_What the fuck?_

"_She was dead! I was there, Michi. There were no signs of life!" I yell, "You don't think I would have known?"_

"_She was trained to put herself into a deathlike state. They were killing her and she didn't want her child to die, so she went into this state and she stayed that way until she was brought to me for burial preparation. I revived her. You must know, Renji, that they had hurt her too badly and she was dying, but she did tell me where to find the information…and she was able to bear your son."_

"_I have…a son…"_

"_Yes, Renji. The boy, Takeo, grew up here in hiding. I watched out for him. I didn't dare tell you because she said that it would be dangerous for you to know. Raiden could find out. But things took an unexpected turn. Takeo found out somehow about Kasumi and he tried to get close to Raiden to exact revenge, but Raiden became suspicious…and then through Takeo…he learned of you. He sent Takeo with the poison to set Byakuya up to die."_

"_Why kill Byakuya and not me?" I ask in shock._

"_He knew you and Byakuya are life partners and he blamed you for them having to kill Kasumi, because you were the reason she left him. He considers it payback. But, Renji, the interesting thing is that he is convinced that you were the associate Kasumi was working with. He thinks you have the information. But you said that the pendant was gone."_

"_Yes, she was wearing it when we were together that night…and it was gone when I found her."_

"_The head captain never got it, so no agent took it. It is possible that it was stolen by an opportunist…but I have another theory. Renji, I believe that Raiden took the pendant, not because he knew about the chip, but as a token. He has what he seeks from you and he does not know it."_

"_If that's true, then we need to get that pendant back from him. But how do we do that? He knows me…he knows Byakuya and Byakuya's in no condition for a mission anyway. Who can get the pendant?"_

"_Takeo…" Michi says softly._

"_But Michi…he is just a kid!" I say, my heart pounding, "and you said they already figured out who he is."_

"_Yes, Renji. But Takeo is a Rukon child…and he is your child. He is strong and he is intelligent…and we are out of options."_

"_So we send him to retrieve it…but Michi, none of this is going to help Byakuya. We need a counter-agent for the poison."_

_He lowers his eyes._

"_There isn't a counter-agent," he says softly, "Byakuya is going to die, Renji."_

"_What? How in the hell do you know that? How do you know all of this that's going on?" I demand, "There's only one way you could know this!"_

"_Yes," he admits, "I am Kasumi's associate. She was trying to get the information to me. And I know about the poison, because it was developed by the Research and Development Department in the Sereitei. It was stolen by this group. They have used it several times with perfect success."_

"_Well," I say, forcing down my fear, "Mayuri Kurotsuchi and Kisuke Urahara are both working on a counter-agent, so I will put my money on them to complete it in time to save him. In the meantime, I have to get Byakuya back to the Sereitei. He can't help me anymore and we have to preserve his life for as long as possible. I'm going to convince him to let Captain Unohana place him back in suspended animation until the counter-agent is found."_

_Michi nods and turns back to Byakuya. Suddenly, I notice that his eyes are open and although he isn't moving much, there is comprehension. I lean over him and give him a gentle kiss._

"_You heard all that?"_

_He can't speak at this point, but he squeezes my hand. He knows…_

_I see him gathering what strength he has, trying to speak. I lean close and I can barely hear his whisper._

"_I will have a fate…no different…than Senbonzakura."_

_Stubborn bastard!_

_I almost say it to him, but I end up just squeezing his hand and gently kissing him on the lips._

"_Captain Unohana is on her way," I assure him, "Just hang in there. If you're so damned determined to stay with me, then she'll get you back on your feet. But just so you know, I think you're crazy, Bya. Just so you know, I think you are out of your mind!"_

_He smiles._

"_Don't…call me that…"_

_He gives the word stubborn a whole new meaning. I love him for that._

_The door opens and Captain Unohana comes in. She quickly leans over Byakuya and spends some time examining him._

"_This is quite serious," she says finally, "You will need to return to the Healing Center for a few hours for treatment. After that, I suggest you return home and rest."_

_Michi and I carry Byakuya outside, while Captain Unohana releases her zanpakutou. We climb onto it and return quickly to the Healing Center in the Sereitei. While Byakuya is being treated, I inform Captain Soi Fon of the group hiding in Inuzuri and then I return to the 6__th__ Division office. I have Takeo summoned. As he walks into the room, a very strange feeling rises up inside of me. It occurs to me that this is my kid. This is my kid and right now, he's in a lot of trouble. And I'm expected to use him. I hate that. I don't want to use him…not any more than I would use Takeshi so. Damn!_

"_You sent for me, sir?" he says softly._

_His eyes are red and he looks worn. I know he can't have slept last night. I don't know that he can do what we're going to ask of him. But he's already in the group. He can get to the pendant. We're pretty much trapped in our roles right now._

_I look more closely at him, now and I start to see it. He has my eyes. He is tall for his age. Even that expression he's wearing now, looking at me. It's the way I looked at Byakuya when I first met him…scared witless. Then I remember…Takeo knows who I am._

"_Sir?" he says again._

_I know I can't do this. I can't send my kid into that den. They're already suspicious. And he might be a Rukon kid, like me, but he isn't battle-hardened. One mistake and they will kill him…and Kasumi's nightmare will come true. She didn't want me to know, because she wanted to protect him._

"_Takeo," his name feels different when I say it now, "You are to report to the Kuchiki manor, where you will attend Captain Kuchiki for the next few days."_

_His eyes widen with a blend of disbelief and relief._

"_Yes sir," he says._

"_Bring clothes and supplies for several days," I add, "This will be an on site assignment."_

"_Yes, Vice Captain, sir," he says, turning and racing out of the room._

_I look after him for a moment before leaving the division office to return to the Healing Center. When I enter his room, Byakuya is sitting up and even though he's three shades too pale, he is, at least eating._

"_Well, that's a welcome sight," I tell him, closing the distance and pulling him into a warm embrace._

_He lets his head fall against my shoulder as I sit down on the bed next to him. Too pale…too warm…trembling just slightly. Even after a couple hours of treatment, this is the best they can do. And predictable as ever, the first words out of his mouth express concern…for me. Damn!_

"_It must have been difficult talking to Takeo. Are you all right?" he asks._

"_I'm fine. I just told him that he is assigned to attend you for the next several days. I…didn't tell him the rest. I wanted to talk to you before talking to him about that."_

"_What is there to say, Renji? The boy is your son. He knows who you are. There is no sense in hiding the fact that you know him as well. It would, perhaps make things easier."_

"_He is the one who poisoned you, Byakuya. How am I supposed to deal with that?" I ask, gazing out the window._

"_It sounded to me like he was used to do that," Byakuya says softly, "You should talk to him, Renji. We should offer him our support. He is your son. His mother is gone. It sounds to me like he really needs his father. Would you…like me to remain here tonight so that the two of you can talk?" he asks._

_I look into the depths of those beautiful dark eyes. I love him so much for this!_

"_Byakuya, if he is my son and we make it through this, you will be an important person in his life. You should be there."_

"_I don't…know that I'll play any kind of role in his life, Renji. You know that I'm running out of time. And even if I survive, if I lose Senbonzakura it will take whatever life is left in me."_

_I take him by the shoulders and he stares back at me._

"_Don't do that, damn it! Don't give in! You have to keep giving this all you have, Byakuya."_

"_Renji, I heard what Michi said about the poison. There is no counter-agent, Renji. Michi said that I am going to die."_

_I grab his face in both hands and force him to look back._

"_I don't give a damn what Michi said, Byakuya! I don't give a damn if every doctor in the fucking Sereitei says you're going to die! I am choosing to believe in Kurotsuchi and Urahara. I believe in your strength. I believe in our love for each other. Byakuya, what we feel for each other broke the power of Kyouka Suigetsu! Do you understand? You are not quitting, damn you! You are going to fight until you draw your last breath! Don't fucking talk to me like a man who expects to die!"_

_He can't answer for a long moment. He just stares at me, wide-eyed. Then his hands come up and rest over mine on each side of his face. The dark eyes fill with tears._

"_I'm sorry, Renji," he whispers, "You are right to be angry with me. I shouldn't have said that."_

"_No," I say in a much softer voice, "you shouldn't have. You can't give up. Otherwise, how can I keep fighting to save you? We need to fight for this together. Byakuya, I can't do this without you."_

_I brush the tears away and bring his head down onto my shoulder. _

"_Just rest a bit and gather your strength. You're going to need it, Byakuya. We can get through this. We can. I promise you, Byakuya, we can."_

_He doesn't say anything, but the arms that wrap around me hold on for dear life._


	8. Connections

**Chapter 8: Connections**

"_Do you want to rest a bit before lunch, Byakuya?" Renji asks quietly._

"_All I have done all day is rest, Renji," I reply, staring out into the garden, "I would much rather talk with you. I actually have something important to ask you."_

_He walks over to join me by the open double doors that lead into the garden._

"_What is it?"_

"_Something occurred to me when I heard Michi talking to you about Kasumi. I started thinking, Renji, that although I feel like I've told you all there is to know about my past, the lessons I've learned, and knowledge I've gained, I really don't know so much about your past. It seems strange that I have been your life partner for nearly two years and still much of your history is unknown to me. The Kuchiki family is one that values history very highly. For me to not know yours seems…wrong."_

"_I…don't think I intentionally kept anything from you, Byakuya," he assures me, "but I think that the subject of my past just hasn't come up."_

"_It's strange, Renji. You have done so much to help me deal with my losses. You know them chapter and verse. You could tell them back to me in full light and color, capturing every detail…but your past exists only in black and white where it exists at all for me. What I know of you is based on who you are…I have no idea at all who you have been in the past."_

"_Does it matter so much? Byakuya, I think one of the things you and I have had to learn is to live now, not in the past or…not too focused on what might happen. Maybe that's why there are some things we just haven't talked about. But at times like now, when the past becomes an important part of what is happening right now, it's a good time to share things we might not have before. Do you know what I mean?"_

_I nod and turn back to the bed. I slip in under the covers and lean back against the pillows. After a moment, Renji joins me. I lean against his warm shoulder, my eyes still turned toward the garden._

"_So would you like to tell me about Kasumi? You always listen when I need to talk. I want to return the favor."_

_He smiles good-naturedly._

"_It would do me some good, I think. It was a huge shock when I found out about Takeo. In fact, the shock was so great…it was like I couldn't react. Well partly because of the shock and partly because so much else is happening all at once. Byakuya, I still don't know how to talk to him about this. I was…just getting to know Takeo as one of our squad members. All I know about him is that he's tall and lanky like I was, he's got talent, but not so much finesse…again, like me, and he stinks at sensing reiatsu. I am impressed with his Shikai. The signs are there, and now that I know, I wonder why it wasn't obvious to me, you know?"_

"_He does favor you," I say, "And when I watched him for the first time, I actually was reminded of you."_

"_But Byakuya, he's grown up without me. I don't even know him. I know he didn't have it easy. He was a street kid like me. Damn! I wish it could have been different for him, you know? Because I think if I had known, then maybe the kid wouldn't have ended up in this mess. I know I didn't have a choice about learning of his existence sooner, I just wish it didn't have to be this way. I hate that he did this to us."_

"_Renji," I say bracingly, "You and I have yet to find out how much he knew about what he was doing. Perhaps there is more to this than we know. We will find out when we talk to him. He should be here soon. While we wait, tell me about Takeo's mother."_

_Renji smiles sadly at the memory. It is an expression that I know I have worn before, when remembering Hisana. To know that Renji felt love like that for this girl strikes a chord with me. I know that feeling._

"_It's funny, Byakuya. When I was a street teen, the person who was most present in my life was Rukia. We were so dependent on each other. We did everything together. We lived in a shack down near the river with a bunch of other kids. Us older kids saw it as our responsibility to protect the younger ones. Why are you smiling?"_

"_It just…seems so much like you and Rukia to do that."_

"_Yeah, well, someone had to or even fewer of us would have stayed alive. As it was, we had our losses…and each time, we hurt a lot because we tried so hard to protect each other. It was just so difficult. Anyway, Rukia and I would get up early every day…stop laughing, Bya, yes, I got up early! We had to so that we could go out and find food for all of us. We had an agreement that whatever we found, we split evenly. If someone was in greater need, we gave what was needed. Apart from what we did to provide for the others, Rukia and I pretty much did what we pleased. There was a woman in town who taught us how to read and helped us learn other things we would have learned if we'd gone to school. But mostly, Rukia and I liked to go down to the river. I'd sit up in a tree and watch her play with water flowers. And I'd daydream a lot."_

"_What did you think about?" I ask, closing my eyes._

"_Mostly, I thought about how I was going to become a soul reaper. I was going to get out of that place. And I always pictured Rukia coming with me. She was always a constant in whatever I dreamed about the future."_

_He gently laces the fingers of one hand into mine._

"_Sometimes, the end of the day would come and I'd be asleep in the tree. If the weather was good, sometimes Rukia would curl up next to me and sleep. Sometimes, she'd just give me a pat and leave me there. It was on one of those nights that Kasumi appeared under the tree. I heard the sound of her feet scraping the ground and I thought Rukia had come back. I dropped down to give her a scare, but I was shocked when I saw it wasn't Rukia. This girl was very different."_

_Now his eyes drift closed as he remembers._

_She was a little taller than Rukia, but fine boned and more pale. Her hair was a lighter brown, lighter than Takeo's and had curls down at the ends. Her eyes were a really pretty blue. But I could see right away she hadn't had it easy. I thought that she was a prostitute. I guess that's what I was supposed to think. She was dressed like one, though looking back now that I know she wasn't, I see that there were signs that I just missed. Anyway, she seemed to be in trouble. She'd been beaten up. I knew a little bit of kido, so I healed her the best I could and used my body to warm her up. It's always so damned cold in Inuzuri…of course, you know that. She left before dawn the next morning, but I told her to come back if she needed anything. And she did. She'd come late at night and we sit in the tree and talk. We talked about anything except our lives as they were right then, because we were both struggling. We talked about being soul reapers and living where it was warm, having enough to eat and things like that. Over time, we grew close and things got passionate, serious. I wanted to take care of her. I hated the thought of what she was doing to survive. So, you know, I wasn't upset at all when she got pregnant, Byakuya, I was actually happy about it. The funny thing is, that even though I knew her child could be my son or daughter, I never really thought of it that way. In my street kid mind, it was just another little brother or sister…because having grown up in the Rukon, that was what I knew of family…just this group of kids fighting to stay alive, depending on each other."_

"_But that is a family still, Renji."_

"_Yeah, just different from what most people think is normal."_

_He falls silent for a moment and releases a soft sigh._

_It's confusing to think that I really didn't know her, that while we sat for hours talking as we did, she never revealed herself to me. Still, Byakuya, I know she must have felt something for me. Something kept bringing her back, you know. She must have found something in those hours with me that made a difference to her. There…had to be something…"_

_I open my eyes and lean over, placing a light kiss on his half-smiling lips._

"_I assure you, Renji, that there was something that drew her to you…and I think maybe it's not so different from my reasons for loving you. It sounds like you were a source of comfort and strength for her…a shelter."_

_He smiles at that._

"_Yeah. I just wish I'd known. I guess she couldn't just tell me, though. She had to keep her identity secret to protect herself. But I feel lucky having had that time with her. I did love her, Byakuya. I was looking forward to the birth of her child. It was someone else who I wanted to love and protect. But it all came crashing down. One minute, we were sitting in the low branches of the tree, looking at the stars, and the next these guys appeared and beat the crap out of me…and they killed her. And at the time, I noticed that they took that pendant of hers. Byakuya, I just chalked it up to being another street death of the kind that was always happening in Inuzuri. I didn't know it was because of the baby…because of me. To know it was…"_

"_leaves you tempted to blame yourself. But don't Renji, you did all you could for her and for Takeo."_

"_Bya…what do I do about this kid? What do I do with the fact that he poisoned you…that he used me to do that? How do I deal with that? I have instincts that are protective. When I was there at the division office taking to him, I just kept thinking…how can I even think of sending him back for the pendant? Because when I think of doing that, it feels the same as the thought of sending Takeshi or Chisaki. My heart just accepts him as if he has always been my son, you know?"_

"_And so he has. Renji, don't feel bad about having protective feelings for your son. That is just the kind of person you are. You have wonderful protective instincts. I know how good it feels to be loved by you, protected by those instincts. I wouldn't expect any less."_

"_But what he did!"_

"_You don't know what he did, really. You need to talk to him, Renji. Only by doing that can you get past these worries of yours. He'll be here soon. When he comes, take him up to the waterfall. Talk to him, Renji. You might just find that you needn't have worried. And remember, whatever he may have done, he is your child still. You should still love your child, even when he or she has done something wrong. There is no shame in that."_

_He turns and there is a look of deep gratitude in his eyes._

"_Thank you, Byakuya. Thanks for listening. You were right…It did help to sort things out."_

"_Good," I tell him, nuzzling deeper into his arms, "You listen to me, often enough. I'm glad I could return the favor."_

_He holds me until I fall asleep, but I wake again as he rises and walks over to the doors that open into the garden. I know he has a heavy heart. And even letting him release some of the weight won't bring him the comfort he needs. He needs to face his son. But while he waits for Takeo to arrive, he walks quietly out into the garden to think. I know when to go to him and when to give him space. I watch him from our bedroom, but let him have the space he needs to think things through._

_XXXXXXXXXX_

"_Sir, Takeo has arrived from the 6__th__ Division," the housekeeper tells me._

_My son is here._

_What the hell do I do with that?_

"_Arigato," I tell her, "Please bring him here to the garden."_

"_Yes sir."_

_I hear his approaching footsteps and all of the things I thought about saying just seem to disappear. As I turn and look at my son, I can't think of what to say. He just stands there, waiting for the vice captain's orders, not knowing the turn our lives are about to take._

"_Takeo, thank you for being so quick to get here. Captain Kuchiki will be pleased to have your help. Now, if you'll come with me, I have a few things to discuss with you."_

_I take Byakuya's advice and we walk out the gate and onto the forest path. I can see that the beauty of it is not lost on my son. Like me, he seems enchanted by the beauty of it. He probably hasn't seen much that is so beautiful. He grew up a street kid, like me. He doesn't say anything, but I can see the curiosity building in his eyes. Perhaps he senses that something is about to happen. We arrive at the waterfall and I hear him catch his breath in amazement._

"_It's beautiful…" he says softly._

"_Yes…Takeo, sit down. We need to talk."_

_He sits beneath one of the cherry trees, watching the petals drift down on the breeze around him._

"_Takeo…Byakuya and I…know who you are."_

_His eyes widen, but like any Rukon kid, he doesn't react immediately. He waits for me to say more. Smart kid._

"_Takeo…Byakuya and I were informed yesterday…that you are the son of a woman named Kasumi."_

"_I…"_

"_Wait…let me finish."_

_He falls silent._

"_I learned also that you are my son, Takeo."_

"_Yes sir," he says softly._

_He stares at the ground._

"_Look, we need to talk about what that means. Takeo, no one told me you were even born. I believed that your mother died before she could give birth to you. Were you aware of that?"_

"_Yes sir. I knew you were not told. My mother was worried it would endanger us if you were told. She thought she was protecting us both," he explains, his eyes still lowered._

"_Takeo, you need to tell me, how long have you known she was your mother? When did you learn you were my son?"_

_Finally his brown eyes meet mine._

"_I learned as a child who my mother was, but I only learned about you when I was sent to the 6__th__ Division on a mission."_

"_A mission for Raiden's group?" I ask._

_He lowers his eyes again._

"_Yes sir."_

_I gather myself. I can't bear the weight of the question I must ask._

"_Takeo, what was the mission that Raiden gave you?"_

_He's shaking. He probably doesn't know whose anger to fear more, Raiden's or mine._

"_I was sent…to watch you. And to find some information that he thinks you have. He…gave me a special compound that I was to expose you to…"_

_How the hell can he say that so calmly?_

"_Vice Captain Abarai, sir, he told me that it would allow him to spy on you, to watch your movements…but he lied to me didn't he? Sir…that's why the captain is ill, isn't it?"_

_His eyes are filling with tears._

"_The compound you exposed me to was a poison, Takeo," I tell him quietly, "It attached itself to my zanpakutou and to me, then it poisoned Byakuya and Senbonzakura."_

_He looks up at me with desperation in his eyes. He didn't know. He really didn't know…and this is killing him._

"_I swear I didn't know it would do that! I swear I didn't know it would hurt anyone. I mean, I know the spying would have been a serious offense, but Raiden was suspicious. He suspected I was up to something and he made me do this to prove my loyalty. I don't think he knows you're my father…but he knows there is more to me than I have told him. So to test me, he sent me on this mission. I was to use the compound on you and your zanpakuto, then search for information he told me had been stolen from him."_

"_Did you know that the information he wants was stolen by your mother?"_

"_No…he wasn't that specific. But if I fail in this mission, he will kill me. He was, as I told you, already suspicious. But I've poisoned the captain. It's really bad, isn't it? Is that why his zanpakuto attacked him?"_

"_Yeah," I sigh._

_There's no point in hiding it._

_His shoulders shake softly with silent sobs._

"_I didn't want to hurt anyone, sir," he says in a choked voice, "All I was trying to do was make him pay for killing my mom. Now I've done something even worse than what he did. Please believe me when I say I never wanted to hurt the captain. I never wanted to hurt you either."_

"_Takeo, who told you I am your father?" I ask._

"_Michi. I told him that Raiden was sending me on this mission to make me prove my loyalty. It was then that he told me who you were. He wanted me to go into hiding, but we decided that it would be no use. Raiden would find me. We felt that the only thing we could do was to see this through and then when I went back, I was going to kill Raiden."_

_He looks out over the top of the waterfall._

"_So what happens now? Are you going to arrest me? I won't resist. I hate what I did. I deserve it."_

"_Takeo," I say, placing a hand on his arm, "I don't know what will happen in the end, what punishment you may face for your actions, but…the fact is, I am your father. I wasn't given the chance to be there for you before. I want to do that now. I don't know how much you know about Kasumi and I, but I will tell you that I loved her. I didn't know who killed her or why…and I was never told about you. If I had been told, I wouldn't have left you. I would have wanted to be with you. So, I'll be with you now. You and I will find a way to make Raiden pay for what he did to Kasumi…and we will make him pay for what he's done to Byakuya."_

"_So…you're not going to arrest me?" he says, hope a mixture of guilt and hope in his eyes._

"_No," I tell him softly, "We need your help, Takeo. Byakuya and I need your help to bring this guy down."_

_He looks up at me with a confused expression._

"_But what can I do? I already told you that Raiden is suspicious. If I am not successful in finding the information he wants, then he will kill me. He told me you were an agent. He said you were helping to steal the information."_

"_I'm not now, nor have I ever been an agent. I was in love with your mother. That's all. She didn't give me the information you are looking for. Michi told me she kept it on a chip inside a blue pendant she always wore."_

_He gives a small gasp._

"_Raiden has it, doesn't he?"_

_Takeo nods. _

"_I told Michi that Raiden suspected you were an agent working with my mom, but I wasn't specific with him about the information I was being sent to find. That's why Michi didn't make the connection about the pendant before. He must have figured it out after I left."_

"_But Raiden doesn't know what he has, Takeo. So we need you to get the pendant from him. I have an idea. We already know some of the information that was stored on that chip. I can give you a small amount of that to placate Raiden. It will buy us time. You can tell him that you have been given a position close to me. That will make you more valuable to him. He'll probably want you to watch me and report back to him."_

"_Can you tell me something?" he asks, "Why does Raiden want to watch you? Why did he attack the captain and not you?"_

"_Raiden may not have figured out who you are…" I tell him, "but apparently, he thinks I was working with your mother to trap him. He also was in love with her and he knew she was having a baby with someone else. It's a good bet that he guessed it was me. He attacked Byakuya because he knows it will hurt me. Takeo, you do know that the captain and I are life partners."_

"_Yes sir."_

"_Raiden wanted to kill Byakuya to hurt me. He used the method he did, because he wanted me to be the one who poisoned Byakuya. He wanted me to carry that guilt."_

"_It's even worse, though," Takeo says softly, "because he got me to betray my own father, too. Even if the compound had been what he said, I still would have been betraying you."_

"_Yeah, I know…and we'll deal with that. But right now, you and I have to focus on two things. We have to keep Byakuya alive until a cure can be found, and we have to get that pendant from Raiden, so we can make him pay for what he did to Kasumi. Will you help me, Takeo?"_

"_Yes sir."_

"_Takeo, when this is over…when we've made Raiden pay, then I want to get to know you better. I want to know my son. I want you to know your father. We'll do that."_

_He nods._

_But there's a lot that has to happen before we reach that point._


End file.
